BlueFuego Bingo!
Posted by Brad
Today we’ve seen a lot of chatter on Twitter about vendors, and this morning I was chatting in GTalk with Lauren from Pace. She was telling me about her frustrations with vendor demos and calls, and there were a few gems from the conversation:
i avoid them so much.
Use the phrase “touch base” as much as possible. people eat that up
im not used to small talk and horrible business slang/jokes…. “jokes”
Ironically, Lauren’s last Twitter update was over 2 months ago, when she asked for recommendations on the best email outsourcing company. Guess she’s been too busy with calls to update.
And shortly after, a message from our good friend @MrRSmith:
So here’s what we want to do at BlueFuego. It’s time to make a game card for you to follow along during those conference calls and vendor pitches. We also want to know what we should never say to you if we ever chat on the phone. (Or, you know, “touch base offline”)
We call it… BlueFuego Bingo.
Leave a comment with your favorite vendor buzzwords, sayings, demo snafu’s, and all those other things you just wait for to be said or shown during a call/meeting. We’ll compile the best and put them into the playing piece, which is certain to make your time with all of us more fun.
Here’s what we’ve heard so far today:
“touch base”
“talk offline”
“sugar off”
“conversion”
“[Insert Big Name Client Here]”
“Demo FAIL”
“Easy to Navigate”
Rhetorical Question about Product
“Private Beta”
“Paradigm Shift”
“Next Steps”
Alright, add yours below in a comment. Together… we can make the vendor world a better place.
Jan 30, 2009
“reach out”
“per our conversation”
Jan 30, 2009
Circle back; deliverables
Jan 30, 2009
From Twitter:
1. saying some virtue is “in their DNA”
2. refer to their business model as “an ecosystem.”
Jan 30, 2009
partnership
blue sky thinking
synergy
Jan 30, 2009
Haha! I love this idea. My personal favorite is “Face Time”.
Jan 30, 2009
“Think outside the box”
“Heads down time”
“Convergence”
“Rock Star” (except when referring to an actual person who plays rock music)
“Seamless integration”
“Pushbutton” or “turnkey” technology
Jan 30, 2009
Too funny. My last boss (who was formerly a consultant) used all those phrases. He was particularly fond of “touch base”.
Jan 30, 2009
From Twitter:
‘game-changer’
Jan 30, 2009
Judging by all the comments and phrases thrown out there, Brad will have to learn sign language if he is going to honor his word
Jan 30, 2009
“Game-changer.” So sick of this, though more at conferences than with vendors. Most vendors don’t make this claim, thankfully.
Jan 30, 2009
Adam stole mine! I was going to say “circle back.”
Jan 30, 2009
“I don’t have an example of that in this demonstration, but I will get that information to you”
Jan 31, 2009
“good question”
“not at this time”
“please hit mute before you call bs on this next feature”
And, some specific to my location:
“Are you a Packers fan”
“Send us some cheese”
“How much snow do you have”
Feb 01, 2009
I hate the phrase “touch base.” There is no base touching and I don’t want you touching me, okay.
Feb 02, 2009
@Todd Do you still get questions about Brett Favre?
Feb 03, 2009
And, also found via Twitter, someone else has already done a BS Bingo card, plus a Buzzword card and a Marketing card.
Feb 03, 2009
@Tim – Only in blog comment streams.
Mar 12, 2009
I. Love. This. Idea! I’m sorry I have nothing to add because I dont take these calls. I tell them we arent looking for vendors at this time and offer no explanation or ‘follow up’ time period.
Mar 12, 2009
Here: How ’bout that weather?
Also:
“Circle back” (popular, see above)
“We can leverage …” (leverage is for home-improvement projects, not connecting with people)
“Innovative” (seriously, if everything’s innovative, then nothing’s innovative”)
“Risk-free” (nothing is risk-free … a falling satellite could hit me at any moment)
So when are you producing the game board?